Five on Friday--July 12

Hi friends! Thanks so much for all your sweet comments, prayers and encouragement over the past week as my husband has been recovering—he’s doing much better now and we are working on making some pretty significant diet changes in our house to hopefully keep other pancreatic attacks away—if anyone has any very favorite really low-fat recipes you love feel free to send them my way! Have a great weekend!

ONE

Ahh the summer bucket list. I’ve always been SUCH a list maker—I find inexplicable delight in crossing items off a list, and I have kids (one especially) who have always craved going and DOING, so I’ve made summer bucket lists each year for my kids to help give us ideas and keep us busy. Some years, that has actually worked out pretty well, last year I think we did almost everything on our list. This year, however, we are pretty far into the summer (especially because we go on vacation next week) and we have LOTS of unchecked boxes staring at us, and the kids are asking “but how come we haven’t done this yet, and when are we going to get to that?” The reality is, we probably won’t get to all the things on this list this year. Does that mean we’ve somehow “failed” at summer? Or gotten lazy? Nope. I’m rebuking that notion 100%! Here’s what I’ve been realizing. Summer has always been really hard for me. I’m more of a homebody and more introverted. Especially in the heat. I don’t want to be out going and doing and seeing every day. But I have a kid who craves that. So in year’s past I’ve PACKED our summers with outings, playdates, daily adventures to keep him entertained. We’ve done everything on our bucket lists and made a lot of memories. And those summers have been fun—exhausting and kind of expensive—but fun. This year I assumed it would be more of the same and since I’ve always made a bucket list and everyone on Instagram made bucket lists I pretty much repeated mine from last year. But here’s what’s changed—two things actually. One, my kids are now a little bit older. They are more content to actually be home because they’re able to get themselves involved in building, reading, movies, legos, being read to, and the trampoline in our back yard. And two, somewhere along the way this year I’ve really come to realize it is just not my job to entertain my kids 24 hours a day or serve as their cruise director on a 3 month tour of all the kid-friendly spots in Jacksonville. I’ve come to be more okay with them watching a movie while I read or letting them just find something to do while I fold laundry instead of feeling the pressure to make every day exciting. So we’ve done less out and about.

Here’s what I am coming to think about bucket lists—and some of this has been influenced by Emily Ley of the brand Simplified. Next year, instead of making a list of things I want to do—which often comes with some internal pressure to make it happen or internal guilt if things go undone—I’m going to make a poster board and have the kids add to it the things we HAVE DONE. Instead of saying “we have to go to the zoo this summer,” I’m simply going to let them add things to the list of “hey we got to do this!” and let that list grow throughout the months we’re off school. I want them to start learning to celebrate and appreciate the things we get to do instead of focusing on the things we missed. I may ask each of them to pick one thing next June that they REALLY want to do that summer, but beyond that, I want to hold summer a bit looser and just enjoy that we can spend an afternoon home reading and building without having to go and do. I’m starting to feel like these bucket lists, while super fun, can often lead to discontent if we miss out on things, or even a sense of entitlement where my kids are starting to expect to get to do ALL the things and are grumpy when we don’t. I think our family needs a bit of a shift for next summer, and I think teaching them to celebrate and say thank you to God for the friends and outings we do get to experience might be helpful.

TWO

One of the main ways people can try and prevent pancreatitis from recurring is to eat as low fat and clean as possible. The pancreas and gallbladder process fat, and we’ve come to realize my husband’s body just can’t do that the way other’s can, so we are working on really cleaning up all of our eating habits, snacking habits, and being very aware of what we are eating—not necessarily to loose weight or go on some fad-diet but to keep him out of the hospital. One of the meals I think are going to be a new staple around here are meals in a bowl. Awhile ago I shared our favorite Hawaiian teriyaki chicken bowl recipe, but that same concept—a base of a brown rice or other whole grain, topped with a lean meat and various other toppings makes for an excellent meal that all 4 of us will eat because the kids can dictate what they want in their bowl. In the past week we’ve done these awesome shrimp fajita bowls, chicken burrito bowls with brown rice, black beans, chopped veggies and salsa drizzled on top, and tomorrow we’re having these Chicken Tzatziki bowls. I’ve done pork carnitas bowls for a dinner party, and thai noodle bowls with chopped chicken, crushed peanuts, bell peppers, scallions and bean sprouts. If you need a super easy way to do a meal for a dinner party, a crowd, or even just your own family, think about what type of flavors you like and see how you can turn that into a build your own bowl bar. I promise your kids will love getting to decide what goes on theirs!

THREE

I mentioned in my last post that each evening I tell the boys bible stories as they fall asleep and how the practice of telling them versus reading it to them has helped me hear these stories in such a fresh way. I love hearing the observations they have, especially my 7 year old, as he hears these stories over and over again. We have done many Old Testament stories that all involve power-hungry kings—King Xerxes from the story of Esther, King Darius who threw Daniel into a lion’s den, and of course King Nebuchadnezzar who tossed Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego into a fiery furnace. The other night Aidan had picked the story of Daniel and Asher had asked for his current favorite, the story of the 10 Lepers who were healed by Jesus and only one comes back to say thank you (a Samaritan at that). After hearing both stories back to back Aidan says “mommy, Jesus was the real, true king, and he didn’t seem to want the power that all those other kings did. He’s a different kind of king.” Out of the mouths of babes. He sure is a different kind of king. The upside down Kingdom of God. Where the last shall be first and the way to honor is through sacrifice and serving those whom the powerful want nothing to do with. In my own time alone I’m reading through the book of Luke this summer and right away, in Luke 1, we get Mary’s Magnificat—her famous song where she declares the coming of this new kingdom. A kingdom where the hungry will be filled and the poor lifted up. The powerful will be brought down and the lowly will be esteemed. Upside down and backwards in every way to our human—especially to our American—sensibilities. Over and over again throughout scripture we find the unexpected happening. Where we expect the religious or the person of power or privilege to step in as the “hero” of a story that’s often not the case. The Samaritan man stops to help when the Jewish priests do not. The one leper who happened to be a Samaritan comes back to say thank you to Jesus and the 9 Jewish men keep going. Mary Magdalene, a woman with a sordid past, is the very first witness to the resurrection and tasked with the job of telling the male disciples Jesus is alive—not the other way around. The woman caught in adultery is made aware of grace where the religious leaders are sent away aware of their sin. The prodigal is welcomed home, Gentiles are dined with, women are lifted up, the poor are healed, children are blessed, and the religious leaders with all the power are put back on their heels as this upside down Kingdom of God comes to life in front of their eyes. A different kind of King.

We live in a nation that has a lot of power. We crave power, wealth, influence, even if you as an individual don’t, we as a country do. And we have a lot of power in this world. But I can’t help but wonder what this upside down kingdom of God would say to America today. The path to greatness as a nation isn’t through slogans or strength. Jesus says it’s through humility, serving others, making sure the least of these—children, women, refugees, victims, minorities, are cared for. I had the privilege of hearing Nish Weiseth speak at last year’s Evolving Faith conference and she said “if our politics aren’t good news for the absolute least of these, they aren’t the politics of the Kingdom of Jesus.” Those are strong words and I don’t necessarily think they mean one political party has the answer or holds the title of “most religiously-correct political party,” but those words have not left my head and have started shaping how I hear our candidates speak and how I read the news. Instead of asking the question “who would do the most good for ME,” I’m trying to at least start asking the question “which of these policies mean a better life for ALL?” Those aren’t easy questions to answer. But as I’m telling these stories to my kids night after night about power hungry leaders and the subversive power of Jesus’ ministry, I can’t help but take a different look at the values America holds. I don’t have any answers. But I want to start asking harder questions. As we head further into election season I want to hold political parties, candidates and policies loosely, listening well, asking more questions than defending a position, and let the Gospel influence my choices more than talking heads on any number of cable news channels. Easier said than done. But I think we have a responsibility to try.

FOUR

This past week my kids have been participating in Vacation Bible School at a friend’s church and have had a fantastic time. I’m actually not a huge fan of the VBS-hopping mentality that I’ve seen quite a bit here—where you sign your kids up for several church’s programs to use them as childcare for the mornings in the summer. I have a variety of reasons for not loving this that have stemmed from spending time on church staffs, listening to conversations about outreach, resources, and VBS, but this year we decided to let our boys join their friends. I knew that meant I’d get 5 mornings to myself—which I don’t really get at any other point in the summer, so I knew I wanted to be intentional with that time. I wrote a few weeks ago about true self-care…how I’ve learned that this isn’t just getting a pedicure, but rather doing the things that truly help fill and care for yourself—for me that’s sleep, good food, quiet, and uninterrupted conversations with friends. Self-comfort are those things we find delight in that do refresh us and help us relax—a bubble bath, a pedicure, a good book, a massage, chocolate, baking—everyone has different ideas of what brings care and comfort to their own bodies and minds. I wanted to be thoughtful about how I spent my mornings this week, not just wasting the time running errands or puttering around the house, but having an idea of what things would truly bring me the most rest in the midst of a long summer. It sounds so silly but sometimes tackling a project in the house is actually self-care for me….getting something done that has been hanging over my head for months always makes me feel so good, so Monday I tackled my entire kitchen. It had become a disaster of a dumping ground—cupboards were no longer organized, things were getting shoved into tupperware drawers and the pantry was a nightmare of open boxes of crackers long forgotten and almost empty spice jars. By the end of the 3 hours Monday morning the whole kitchen had been cleaned out, bags of stuff ready to donate or tossed and now the joy I experience opening that pantry is the gift that keeps on giving :). I’ve done some writing, had coffee with a friend, and yes ran some errands this week, but I’ve also enjoyed tackling a couple household tasks that are way too hard to do with the kids home. There’s no right or wrong way to think about self-care. A nap is awesome. But sometimes pulling everything out of your pantry and reorganizing it is pretty dang awesome too.

FIVE

Last Christmas I was given some cash as a gift and told to use it on something I really wanted for myself, not just a random browse through Target, but to use it thoughtfully on something I would truly enjoy. I thought about it for awhile and knew that the one thing I really wanted to try was a subscription to the company Book of the Month. I’ve heard it talked about on podcasts and social media for a long time and I’ve always been so intrigued, wondering if it was the kind of thing I’d enjoy. Every month they send members an email with 5 titles that are releasing that month—they always choose a variety of genres to represent in their 5 picks for each month, and for $14.99 a month you get to choose one of those and they will send you the hardcover new release to your door (which can be close to $30 if you buy in a bookstore). I had been given enough for a year’s membership, so 12 hardback books over the course of a year, and suspected this would be a fun treat for myself. I actually don’t buy many books—only if it’s an author I truly want to support—usually I am a library girl, but I thought a brand new, beautifully covered book arriving in the mail for me each month would be such a fun treat. The other thing I wanted to do was push myself to read books I normally wouldn’t pick up, and I had a suspicion Book of the Month would do that for me. And it has. Because I have to choose from one of their 5 picks (you can skip a month any time if you really don’t like the picks), I’ve selected books I don’t know that I would have bothered requesting at the library. And I’ve truly loved some of them. One of them has been one of my favorite books of this whole year. Today I wanted to recommend this beautiful novel, Beyond the Point by Claire Gibson, my May pick for my Book of the Month box. It tells the story of 3 young women who all enter West Point for various reasons right before September 11, 2001 and it follows their stories of friendship, their first deployments, love, heartbreak, and strength for the next many years. Gibson grew up on the campus of West Point as her father was an officer there, and her descriptions of campus life, military life, and what it’s like to be a female in a strongly male-dominated world were stunning. I loved this book and flew through it. Definitely worth picking up one of these days!